Girlfriend constantly puts me down reddit My boyfriend puts me down for my quirks and I feel like is trying to change me instead of loving me for who I am. we met three years ago. Maybe she thinks she’s motivating you to be better, and then shoving it down your throat in the arguments. You should've seen her during our first year together, she was When you are sat down losing someone you love very much and you have always been there for your partner when he has need you and when you need him he is not there it sucks it’s not He was so bothered by his social anxiety he'd constantly practice conversations, just by talking to himself. " I've been direct in telling her that I'm mature enough to handle disappointment if plans fall Reading this reminds me of the hell I put myself through with an ex who used me for a year and a half for money and gifts. she puts down my hair, my appearance, my body, my weight, my makeup, my clothing, my college major, my ethnicity, my bedroom, my hobbies, my other So I’ve been friends with this girl for a few years and she told me she had feelings for me and I started dating her about four months ago, but she is about six years younger than me and to be honest I’ve never dated someone this long before. I honestly don't know what to do. I would honestly just tell her to go be with one of those other men and go back on Girlfriend puts me down and gets frustrated with me I am posting this because I need advice on what I should do. No matter what I do she criticizes me. My girlfriend (female, 24) and I (male, 25) have been together for about a year, and known each other for the majority of our young lives Skip to main content. Do you think it might benefit YOU to go to a session or two and bring it up? "[therapist], I wonder if you can give us some suggestions on how to navigate Bob and me having conversations without negative talk or self-deprecating remarks - from my perspective it comes up in about 90% of our conversations, where Bob calls himself it just doesn’t make any sense to me every interaction we have is SO negative because he just puts me down, makes fun of me or guilt trips me. I think she is fantastic. I don't view it as fun banter, rather it's hurtful, and I would like to know how to address it She puts the whole weight on me, like I need to act the way she wants me to, or I am the one ruining everything. I tried to explain to her that she was just a friend telling me about a TV show. I'm on my last 3 months of university, which was on a scholarship and all he has been doing is gambling, drinking and raving about how useless I Verbally abusive parent, regularly being put down etc Meditation is a tool to see past the words being said and understand that the bully themselves are in pain. I'll try and break down the process of the issue. We need to talk about this Over the 5 years we have essentially grown up together; I feel like a big part of me has been shaped by her and likewise for her too. Questioning my manhood. I have repeatedly told him that's not okay with me, and explained to him my boundaries of how I want to be respected in our relationship. It makes me think of worse case scenarios. it wasn't like this right away but i should have seen the warning signs. he’s mad i don’t want to go to the bar with I've tried to bring this all up with her, and she just tells me I'm being silly or whatever or she gets annoyed and tells me to trust that she loves me. After I’m attacked by all of my She'll constantly put me down about the clothes I'm wearing or really just anything. If I show up five minutes late (rarely) she will say “if you apply to a new job, they’ll be hearing about this”. advice for context I've been friends with this girl for around a year and only recently I've began to notice I know this isn't sustainable, I just want this person who is constantly swimming in sorrow to leave and have my girlfriend back. In the past two months i really started to not care so she usually recognizes that it's not working and starts acting like nothing ever happened, also acting suddenly very sweet and caring (until she My girlfriend argues about everything, says she doesnt want to put in the effort because she doesn't need to. She says she’s doing her part by plastering pictures of herself involved with charities all over her social media. They didn’t really seem happy for me when 11M subscribers in the relationship_advice community. Shes constantly commenting on my height as she is marginally taller, complains about how she can never It’s Driving me Crazy! Neil is tired of his girlfriend continually pointing out her flaws and insecurities and it is really turning him off! He thinks she is beautiful and tells her often. I don't know what to do. Her response to that was "well we both see that a little differently". You can deal with people that put you down so that they stop doing it and leave you alone. i don’t want to be anywhere NEAR him when he’s drinking After I finally put my foot down and ended the relationship with my ex, one of his friends contacted me and said that now that I was out, I can see the relationship for what it really was and to begin focusing on how to make myself happy again. I've Hi reddit, Lately my girlfriend has become very needy and she constantly needs reassurance. Didn't tape a package the right way. My best friend and I tend to be very similar, but any time I would get like that, he Hi All! We have been together for 4 months. She is playing a game here, one specifically Okay to start things off I love this girl and I want to try and work things through and not leave when things are hard. I’ll call her Molly. I'd say flat out "stop Emotional abuse is insidious and can be hard to spot, especially when the abuser is trying to pass off their actions as romantic. She recently broke down and told me that she is petrified I will 'run away' with a more beautiful woman. Nevertheless, it was midnight. Is this Any partner who puts you down, has an agenda to control you and manipulate you. Reading this reminds me of the hell I put myself through with an ex who used me for a year and a half for money and gifts. These comments actually don't sound funny to me. She would put me down about absolutely anything and everything. She's broken you down and is using you like a mat to wipe her shoes In the conversation, I went down memory lane about a set of guy friends i had from age 19-29, all of who were MUCH better at the sports we did than i was (for reference we mostly did rock Hi All! We have been together for 4 months. My first instinct was to try scraping the ice, as opposed to throwing a ton of ice melt down on the concrete. And everything had to be tldr gf of 5 months apologizes for everything and it's finally starting to wear me down. Do they get a rise from making me upset? I just am so frustrated with them and every time I make a decision without them they get Hi Reddit, I have a girlfriend who seems to need a lot of reassurance, is insecure and has low self-confidence, and I need help if I can deal with it anymore! I love her, but I definitely feel that the 'love' is being eroded and I'm caring less and less and getting colder every month that ticks by, and that obviously doesn't help the problem. " Out of everyone in my class she singles me out, I have a It's been her habit since the beginning, she has always made jokes about me, teasing me that I have a small d**k, saying I have skinny arms, calling me ugly and other stuff. At a party, as it was dying down and everyone had left, she sat down to talk with another friend while I sat and waited to drive us home. We here happy. But it's becoming a bit of an issue within our relationship. 0 coins. Tell her things like, "I don't like the way you treat me. Things were going great at first and she's exceptionally nice and honestly the sweetest person I think I've ever met but she's deeply insecure and it's starting to become a bummer. She's so wonderful The instructor went around the classroom, asking what each person wanted to do. Need Advice She started acting this way ever since I had gone to school/college, I even let her know i won't be available that much but I respond to her messages when I'm free. So if she’s unhappy it’s because of something I’m not doing. She's always been a "I want to be center of attention" type of girl and won't hesitate to put others (me) down to achieve that. She tells me that she's making up for lost time since she Hypergamy my friend. If it was anyone else, I would have given the finger and walked away. To constantly be told that you aren’t doing good enough and to just be constantly put down helps nothing. She's now begging me not to break-up with her, and I said I need a few days to cool-off from what happened. We started dating almost 2 years ago and early on she saw a picture of me and my friend from years prior of us just together. She will say that she "knows me" and "knows who I am" so she "knows" I can't do whatever it is I want to accomplish. So I went with it, tried giving her time-frames etc. She's a very math-oriented person and writes at a high My girlfriend (39F)is constantly pointing out my (55M)supposed "flaws" and doesn't seem to appreciate the positive things I bring to the relationship. r/relationships A chip A close button. Very smart. People with low self esteem and insecurities are easier to walk all over. My girlfriend broke up with me twice in the past, both times were very tough for me and shortly afterwards on both occasions she got with another guy. Music is a huge part of my life and I'm very protective over the I'm sick of my "friends", they always call me an incel and try to put me down. You two But yeah, text arguments are a terrible idea, as it's too easy to mistake tone. I told Girlfriend [22F] is constantly inconsiderate toward me [23M] Relationships Together for 8 months. Told me she wasn't doing ok, and didn't feel like she knew what she needed. I think that’s cool and she’s helping to spread the . This isn't my first relationship with someone with mental health issues. In the conversation, I went down memory lane about a set of guy friends i had from age 19-29, all of who were MUCH better at the sports we did than i was (for reference we mostly did rock climbing but also running and cycling). Me and Molly grew very close last year in school and this year I became quite close with one of Molly’s friends, we’ll call her Lisa. Ask her why she does what she does and if she even notices that she does?( some people do it for no reason ) Also make She says some rude comments to me about the way I dress. Open menu Open navigation Go to Reddit Home. Personally speaking, I couldn't do it. By doing this he was able to grow and perfect his conversation skills. Wade was overturned in the states my girlfriend has been very upset with it, understandably. If I make the slightest mistake at anything, or make any kind of bad decision, she attacks my entire character and everything else. Life was reasonably calm. I dated a couple females like this and it seemed to me that they did this so that they could interpret the My girlfriend (20F) needs me (21M) to do all her written homework assignments. But she kept saying that she didn’t care and continues to call me a cheater and a liar. He says I don’t use my brain. If you I (21m) have a girlfriend (21f) that wants me to stop talking to a friend that I’ve known for 6+ years. More than I could hope for. Now, granted I View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. If someone consistently treats me bad then they will make my shit-list really fast. Shes in university and spends half her time living in a different city. Didn't put the dishes away right. It’s very alive and well. I've I mean, there are nicer ways to say you don't like it. What’s unreasonable is how you’re both going about the situation. Not once did they ever put me down, or make discouraging comments. I have the worst I've noticed that lately you'll come out with these really derogatory putdowns that you laugh off. Log In / Sign Up; Advertise My girlfriend is constantly looking for reassurance that I will never break up with her, she asks about 10x face to face a day and if she is at work, I will get about 5; 200+ words saying the same fucking shit day after day “please never leave me, promise you are who you say you are, Im scared you’ll leave me” and about 100x for me to promise that I will only tell the truth and never I don’t know if I’m just overreacting but I feel suffocated. this is me too. The anxiety was constantly making me over think things; I had to justify everything he said. Which was a lot. I know it's hard to understand now, but you have so much more worth than you are giving yourself credit for. I've even gone so far as to purchase a squirt bottle, joke that I'm going to try to train her like a cat, and proceeded to spray her I don’t know if I’m just overreacting but I feel suffocated. 1 update - Medium. I'm torn between having my freedom from an overbearing relationship and being stuck in a loveless agreed. The OOP is u/repinator posting in r/relationship_advice. She won’t let me do anything without her either or she will have a fit. Don't get me wrong, I can still be quite negative, but I've also learned more through the teachings of my friends and extended family. We've been together for 5 months in a distanced relationship and see each other once every 3 weeks. Update: she reached out yesterday. Relationships I'm not sure If this is her way of encouraging me to do better, it’s not working. He keeps calling me dumb, stupid, a bitch, a thot, slow, etc. I find it so hard to make new friends which is the reason I even stay. i considered her to be my best friend and told her everything. I TL;DR- a close friend is wonderful to spend time with one-on-one, but in a group I feel like she puts me down almost all the time, and it's just me, not others. She turned around and said quietly “Fuck you I've been back to her place only once to get most of my things, and again she went back and fourth from being overly sweet, insulting me, and out right threatening me before slapping me when I told her that she was being crazy. I've told her very clearly that this bothers me. She will say I am too mentally ill to go through with these challenges, and that people don't ever change. What do I even do, Reddit Tl;Dr: Girlfriend [F23] gets constantly annoyed with me [M24], when I ask why she gets even angrier leading to arguments that make zero sense. Get app Get the Reddit app Log In Log in to Reddit. I’ll just give you guys an insight of our relationship first: We were best friends since we were 15 yo and we started flirting when we were 20 and we’ve been dating for a couple of months now. I When I came back she was looking on my phone and got mad at me asking who she was. Women are naturally constantly looking for a better partner. Something I said made her feel like I was annoyed with her which led to an argument where she cried the whole time and told me she was sensitive and that it seemed like i never cared because I never ask how she’s doing more frequently. My girlfriend constantly criticized me and randomly broke up with me. They didn't even mean to, but they always made me This is Reddit's very own solution-hub. This was after being married for 2 years, together for 4, and it's not like I had changed jobs, or was constantly "working late" we worked for the same company even, just different locations, just out of the blue. Our relationship hit a very low point about 8 months ago. It’s straining our relationship and I don’t know My girlfriend (23/f) constantly demeans and insults me (25/m) I don't know what to do with my girlfriend anymore. I really don’t know how to fix things or if we even can. He says the meanest things to me. There have been a few times recently where she will ask for something like food at midnight and I’ll go out get it for her and see her and then a week later she will be threatening to break up if I ‘don’t change’ saying I don’t put in enough effort after something like me not being able to stay the night It just seems like your girlfriend needs to be dating someone who has a similar "healthy-style" mindset. I was so drained. Now I don't mind I have a group of friends that I meet up with regularly. It can hurt your feelings when someone criticizes you, makes fun of you, or puts you down. We'll call her (L) for the sake of the story. She texts me every waking minute of the day, it doesn't matter if I'm at home, class, Generally people will put others down when they feel depressed or inadequate. Dealing with self harm, half of the time I wasn’t even sure I was going to live, let alone what my future was going to be. And this makes the idea of sex I have a friend that constantly puts me down in front of others then acts nice when it's one-on-one. She has a little girl (3) who knows me as daddy. I have cut out members of my family because I don't appreciate the way that they treat me. I'd break up. It just puts me off whenever I'm in a good mood. The problem is the constant negativity, I've been with her 2 and a half years but I've only just really started noticing it more and it's really starting to View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. Do you think it might benefit YOU to go to a session or two and bring it up? "[therapist], I wonder if you can give us some suggestions on Having her phone on silent isn't as alarming to me as her constantly putting her phone down as you enter a room. At least I'm away from her. Music is a huge part of my life and I'm very protective over the music I listen to. After some time, her friend noticed I was waiting she told gf that it's getting late and that they can continue another time. I grabbed my phone back and unblocked/re-followed reiterating how stupid and childish that was, and it all kicks off. Like is this the prize she is willing to pay to be accepted into the group? On the cost of your well being and I even told her that i have family issues where i’m in a similar position, my parents do the same trying where they constantly blame me for everything. * Constantly questions choices I make - like the other day we went outside to take care of the ice on the driveway. What made Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now my best friend constantly puts me down and i don’t know what to do . But obviously each person is different. I am the middle child and both of my brothers have seen success socially and I have not, It makes me My girlfriend [F26] constantly compares me [M29] to other men in her life. He used to be glued to it, probably somewhat like OP's gf. TLDR - My wife makes all the money in our relationship and puts me down constantly, and I want to divorce her. I have tried laughing about it, and shaking my head silently. Each of them just left me questioning myself, even having me look in the mirror at my face for anything wrong. Yeah girls think it's only girls who do this. yes, it’s okay to not care as much My boyfriend (28M) constantly wants to complain and tries to manipulate me (33M) when I put my foot down, how to make him see what he is doing is manipulative? We've been together for about 6 months now and I'm not sure what to do. All I do is ask my mom after she yells at me, why she always want to argue with me. I constantly try to put my best friend up and I try to choose my moments to make a "teasing" joke carefully; I didn't think that'd be so much to ask for back. To me, this meant we needed to buckle down on everything, including finances. [new] I've been with my girlfriend for about a year and a half. At first it was everything to do with that case, she was upset and would come to me and vent. Like you, it seems my only reason for existence was to make her happy. but at the same time it feels wrong and i don’t want to compromise what i know to be GOOD values about the world and the people in it. e giving our 9 month old medicine in the morning) then she is superior and I am just a little rat (this is how she makes me feel by He constantly put this pressure on our relationship and for it to last forever, and I thought he would get better once we were together, but he got worse, and I felt trapped. I make a lot of time for her and travel down there as much as possible and she comes home to see me at every opportunity I love her very much but this texting is burning me out. She started asking me to check my phone to make sure I wasn't talking to other women. he’s mad i don’t want to go to the bar with him and my uncle. The only thing is he doesn't see a problem with it and thinks if it's my fault when he's mad he has the right to. I am not a fan of long distance anythings, but I am willing to give moving around a shot because I dont have many friends but there's this guy I play games with online and he constantly makes fun of me and shames me, I got out of prison at age 20, and started working temp jobs for like no money and living with my grandparents, and he literally will say things like "haha I I tell her yesterday afternoon that I feel more and more like our contact is breaking down and that I want to do something about this. I just ignored her, and found out that it just So I’m dating this girl. Don’t have much experience in dating. She constantly skips going to work and it's beginning to grind on me. She travels for work 2-3 months at a time, then gets 2-3 months off. Okay to start things off I love this girl and I want to try and work things through and not leave when things are hard. "Do you make such fashion choices on purpose to attract attention?" "Why do you feel a I've tried to hint, both subtly, and not so subtly, that while I'm not some prude etiquette nerd, her farting and burping disgusts me and I'd like her to tone it down. While we can't exactly spend time in real life, we spend many hours on webcam, and I feel absolutely comfortable about this whole thing like I've never felt before. From that moment on she always showed a disliking towards TL;DR- a close friend is wonderful to spend time with one-on-one, but in a group I feel like she puts me down almost all the time, and it's just me, not others. So it’s pretty My girlfriend(29F) has recently told me(28M) that she doesn't want to tell me anything anymore because I will judge her. I told him that it makes me feel like he's not interested in me when he's on his phone and pointed out that I try to give him my full attention when we're together. I’ve been good friends with this girl in school for about two years. The relationship was brilliant for the first few months (honeymoon period obvs but My girlfriend always brings my mood down when I show signs of happiness around her . However, I feel like I constantly have to give her Getting really hurt over my girlfriend constantly rejecting me Before I begin, yes, I have heard of dead bedrooms, no, I'm not looking for advice or to leave my girlfriend, yes, we have talked about this multiple times, no, she isn't cheating on me. She claims I monopolize She accuses me of not changing my ways and claims I'm a poor communicator and a neglectful boyfriend. It’s embarrassing sometimes because she does it front of people. Get out while you still can if he refuses to accept your boundaries. Valheim Genshin Impact Minecraft Pokimane Halo Infinite Call of Duty: Warzone Path of Exile Hollow Knight: Silksong Escape from Tarkov Watch Dogs: Legion. Examples: He sounds toxic and manipulative. she says I'm not cool, I argue that I am and she says "no you're not. I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, so I'm not perfect, but I'm aware of my issues and apologize when they get the best of me. After everything he put me through I realized I can’t help him. I'm on my last 3 months of university, which was on a scholarship and all he has been doing is gambling, drinking and raving about how useless I Let me remind you though, her house was 5 mins away on foot. So I just said "Please don't tell me how attractive you find TV and movie actors when They are invested in keeping you down, controlled, and powerless. I applied to a couple of universities this year and got into some of the really good ones. Attractive. Girlfriend (f36) keeps putting me down for every mistake I make and can be very unforgiving. I’m growing very tired of this. Like many relationships we have had our ups and downs. You just have to learn to take care of It's been her habit since the beginning, she has always made jokes about me, teasing me for having a small d**k, saying I have skinny arms, and other stuff. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder and I am a perfectionist to a truly damaging extent when it comes to my mental health. She’s just more open about it than most. My family members all hate me They treat me like trash My older sibling just treats me like I'm the problem in the family when I was just sitting there They constantly put me down and make me feel like I am nothing . Now, she can't get over about how I had left her walking home by herself like that after midnight hours. it wasn't like this right away but i should Getting really hurt over my girlfriend constantly rejecting me Before I begin, yes, I have heard of dead bedrooms, no, I'm not looking for advice or to leave my girlfriend, yes, we have talked I(25M) left my Girlfriend(23F) because she was constantly scaring me which resulted in me falling down the stairs and breaking two fingers, I am considering taking her back but I am not sure, I Write down some of the things she has been saying, sit her down and show her. It was EXHAUSTING. My overapologizing stems from both of those things- when I screw up, that means I'm not perfect, which makes me feel shitty, and it makes me feel like I let everyone down, which makes me feel even worse, on and on and on My (32M) girlfriend (31F) always seems to turn things around on me, even with minor disagreements, she ends up always always going upstairs or not talking to me and pulling her face, she seems to believe that if I don't think of anything (i. She’s 21 and I’m 24. Some background information: Me a [21M] and girlfriend a [23F] have been dating for about 6 months. My family is always putting me down cause I'm overweight and never had a girlfriend before. For example, when I shared my decision to go to med school and take the MCAT exam, she dismissed it as annoying I hope that he is working on this in counselling. I do put effort in this , but i feel like it’s almost not recognised. I wish I could do more, but I do most of the childcare and take care of the house, as well as my part-time work. She feels guilty for, as she puts it, "letting me down. So, my (29f) girlfriend (22f) is constantly on her phone, first thing in the morning to last thing at night, now don't get me wrong I enjoy being on my phone also, but I do feel like there is a time and a place and that quality time is important. When I have discussions with my friends who know only few of the things that happened in my life or what I have been through, they just mention how unlucky I am and Father constantly puts me down and criticizes me for being a dead-beat, useless leech. I would estimate we send about 60 every day for a year now and I feel She constantly puts me down and says that she wishes I was a virgin and her first and vice versa. She actually reminds me of a narcissist - constant fault finding and once you’ve done what they want, they find other things to criticise. I’ll just give you guys an insight of our relationship first: We were best So, pretty much what it says. Overall things are well. Insults me, never listens, complains about things when she told me she wants me to do them. We haven’t spoken since (last It took years of various people telling me how much of a downer I was for me to start making the changes that I needed to. Log In / Sign Up; Advertise on Reddit; Shop This is Reddit's very own solution-hub. I'm like, great, so none of us get the girls then? Girls won't want me because you "put me down" and they won't want you cause they won't want an asshole. Exams, work tasks, I am all on-fucking-top of. She texts me every waking minute of the day, it doesn't matter if I'm at home, class, work, with my friends, studying, driving, whatever and whenever, I'm getting texts. So, my (29f) girlfriend (22f) is constantly on her phone, first thing in the morning to last thing at night, now don't get me wrong I enjoy being on When I was constantly complaining to my best friend about my relationship, she one day sat me down and explained that listening to how unhappy I was didn’t seem to be helping me. Maybe she thinks she’s motivating you to be I dont have many friends but there's this guy I play games with online and he constantly makes fun of me and shames me, I got out of prison at age 20, and started working temp jobs for like no money and living with my grandparents, and he literally will say things like "haha I Father constantly puts me down and criticizes me for being a dead-beat, useless leech. So ever since Roe v. She likes to blame me for her room being a mess when i literally have 3 pieces of clothing there and yet She wants me to “put in effort” and “show her I do care about her time and feelings and respect her” but I feel like I do that. I once returned from a Considering he puts down his exes to you I'd also wonder what he was going to say about me if we every broke up. She said she had all the right to do so and is not going to When i decide to put my foot down we get into a heated argument and when i tell her she has a problem she projects everything onto me and than starts giving me the silent treatment. Please tell me why Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now BF (22M) always puts me down for no reason . But she is the one setting up the situation that way, this is horribly manipulative. Seriously. When I was younger I was put down a lot by my Verbally abusive parent, regularly being put down etc Meditation is a tool to see past the words being said and understand that the bully themselves are in pain. Albeit with COVID and Lockdowns (we were in it for months here in Australia) causing the usual issues with being stuck at home constantly which did cause some arguments that I put down to cabin fever and missing family and friends that I totally understand. Support Needed 🫂 I am a very loving and sweet natured person and I am shocked at how many I love her very much but this texting is burning me out. I’ve told her that I don’t care about my sexual past but she doesn’t understand. Our relationship is great, save for one annoying habit of hers - she Yeah, it feels unfair that she tells me how I don’t care or put any effort in. It doesn't make him look very good when he does it. Amen to this. That stuff rarely gets the My girlfriend invited me to go out with them because Alexis said she wanted her and my girlfriend to go out and flirt with Navy guys. I immediately break down into tears, it’s so humiliating and heart breaking that he thinks he can just insult me and laugh at my expense after 3 years together, and after i’ve been vulnerable with him. It is disrespectful and manipulative, because she Let me start by saying that we've been together for quite a while, in nearly all aspects we're completely happy together but this is really bugging me. Nice job. What she said last weekend is still eating at me. We've been together for about 2. Here are 11 unacceptable behaviors that It's not a good trait, and I don't know whether it's me being an unthoughtful ass, or that I just got the B-stock of brains. Especially since she constantly displays such behaviour. r/raisedbynarcissists A chip A close button A chip A close button Yeah, it feels unfair that she tells me how I don’t care or put any effort in. It wrecked my self-esteem for years. My girlfriend made it clear she is in a relationship and said Me and my GF have been going out for nearly 2 years now and it’s both of our’s first long term relationship. If that She puts the whole weight on me, like I need to act the way she wants me to, or I am the one ruining everything. If you put your wife on a pedestal and she puts you up on one too, it's an equal relationship. But she is the one setting up the situation that way, this is horribly My BF has subtle put downs for me and I need help. And it ought to be followed by a token of reconciliation such as a toast or a pat on the shoulder Okay, we have been together for almost two years. When she is off of I’m mostly quiet at work and my boss constantly puts me down. I'm on my last 3 months of university, which was on a scholarship and all he has been doing is gambling, drinking and raving about how useless I All I do is ask my mom after she yells at me, why she always want to argue with me. Please know that there is someone out My girlfriend (F22) and I (M25) have been together for over a year now, however the last few months have been hard because she keeps trying to prove me wrong or sort of dismiss my opinion on anything as not right and her way is the right way no matter what. Never happened. But I love her so deeply, I’m so confused . Her family So I have a bit of an issue. I feel like I When i decide to put my foot down we get into a heated argument and when i tell her she has a problem she projects everything onto me and than starts giving me the silent treatment. Life is short and that bullshit is simply not worth your time. My savings can probably last 2 years for rent if I should move. I’ve never experienced a girlfriend who’s actually been nice to me before (had some toxic relationships) so it was really different for me. Gf said it was fine. This year I’ve become very friendly with Lisa, and while I’m definitely still friends with Molly - I am Ive been with girls that I used to constantly day dream of sex with, but with her I feel like I avoid sex. im 25 and went to uni, now i work as a manager and dj in radio im an assistant programme director and presenter of an afternoon show. Normally this ended in a shouting match but this time i felt a If someone puts you down, then stop interacting with them. i’ve been suicidal since last year and i After yelling for 10 minutes I didnt say anything. Nothing was ever good enough. My (23m) girlfriend (23f) always says or does something to bring my mood down when I’m being I hope that he is working on this in counselling. Theres no reason to stay with someone who puts you down The pedestal thing is only really a bad thing when the other person likes being put up there. Her parents and family love me, and I love them I didn't have it quite as bad as your girlfriend, but I spent two years convinced that my boyfriend was going to get bored and dump me at any minute because I had such crippling self doubt. I tried everything in the book to be there for my ex, and no matter how close I was to keeping him Skip to main content. We came back from a week long trip to Skip to main content. Plus she treats you this way because you tolerate it If I tell her politely to put down the phone she will get defensive, say "don't I have the right to message my friends after work?", accuse me of being controlling or say I'm being Sit down when it's calm and have a long talk with her. The problem is the constant negativity, I've been with her 2 and a half years but I've only just really started noticing it more and it's really starting to Me: "Oh, the guy sounded like Yoda" Him: "No he's not" Me: "Yea, but he sounded like Yoda" Him: "No he isn't" Me: "Allright but I mean to say I thought he sounded like Yoda" In continuation, I want to be able to avert any tension. It's been on my mind recently that I feel like I should do something, it puts me down every time because I feel incompetent. Whenever I drive us anywhere IN Father constantly puts me down and criticizes me for being a dead-beat, useless leech. She’s Her work is all that we talk about. It hasn't been long since we started dating and I have noticed a pattern in her behavior, she constantly has ups and down at regular basis but they usually go away after a week But since last 2 months her emotions have been out of place non stop, she needs my reassurance thrice a Girlfriend constantly lectures me that I should donate my time, that money is important but the charities need us to donate our bodies and effort to spread the message. My SO uses his phone a lot for work. Recently we had a fight and She has however, booked flights down to see me. She is insecure (in all aspects of her life aside from me like family/career/etc) and because of this she is super insecure in bed. Can I ever rebuild the trust? Every time I remember that I once dated a babe who was relentless in putting me down, I’m reminded of the importance of having a partner who builds your worth with their She's always been a "I want to be center of attention" type of girl and won't hesitate to put others (me) down to achieve that. Update - 26th February 2024. There have been a few times recently where she will ask for something like food at midnight and I’ll go out get it for her and see her and then a week later she will be threatening to break up if I ‘don’t change’ saying I don’t put in enough effort after something like me not being able to stay the night Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now BF (22M) always puts me down for no reason . How can I let her know how I’m feeling without being an asshole? Would it be I said the disrespect keeps happening, and then I brought up a time when she put me down in front of her friends. I know she tends to say things she doesn't really mean, but I don't do that, and I I had super low self esteem and I had a few friends who would put me down sometimes, and I got the vibe they wanted me to be “beneath” them. Then my mom It'd make me a lot happier to have someone around who actually encourages me to speak up and say what's on my mind, or at least won't shoot me down when I try. This is not a habit. So I’ve (24M) been with my girlfriend (21F) for a year. She always says she is sorry and tells me "I'll Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now with my [24F] girlfriend. Listening to her doesn't bring me down, because I feel I am helping. My F(18) friend F(19) have been friends since childhood. My father constantly puts me down . One of the group has, over the past year or so, taken to making barbed put down comments UPDATE: I've just discovered that my (M29)'s girlfriend (F27)'s family is putting me down in front of her (and me). Her first comment was "why are you doing that? it's not going to work". Nothing good comes from dealing with this behavior. She is asking me to resolve this, because it is eating her inside and out. But I can't let this go. I have a few more things at her place, but I really don't want to see her again, so I'm considering just calling that a loss. i thought that we were the closest of friends until another friend, harley My ex pointed a loaded shotgun at my chest, held a knife to my throat, constantly put me down and told me I wasn't enough, took me way too long to wise up and get away from him. I am not the OOP. NFL Girlfriend constantly gives me an attitude and even gets mad over simple things most of the time just blames it on her mood swings. She is ruining it just as much as me, actually more. We live in different cities (bc of uni) but our family houses are in the same city My gf later asks how the reviews went down, I showed her the exchange and immediately she refused to read it, grabs my phone and blocks the girl immediately and then starts questioning why I followed her. My boyfriend (21) , of 2 1/2 years who I (19) also have a 11 month daughter with, has constantly been putting me down and making me feel bad about myself. Now I have graduated, have a job and I am finally starting to live a more normal life. After I’m attacked by all of my siblings, and my mom, it makes me feel upset and not want to be near them at all. When we were writing a birthday card to our friend I accidentally misspelled their newborn Need help with your relationship? Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! Girlfriend puts me down a lot in a joking way. It is what they think and feel they need to do to stay alive! First step is to sit her down and have a serious conversation with her. Here are 11 unacceptable behaviors that Men constantly let me down and I’m noticing I’m starting to not give a flying fu*k anymore . I've just discovered that my (M29)'s girlfriend (F27)'s family is putting me down in front of her (and me). Sometimes I feel like I'm not allowed to have We organise days/weekends away. I am unhappy with her and I know I will be unhappy without her. Sports. i thought that we were the closest of friends until another friend, harley Every time I leave her house or have to go to work after spending time with her, she becomes upset, sad, and guilt-trips me by claiming she's lonely and has nobody. If you want to be happy then surround yourself with others who make you happy. My boyfriend constantly puts me down and makes me feel bad about myself. Taking all that Our hot periods when every thing is great make me want to stay and then these arguments that happen make me want to leave. Cut them out. Ongoing as per OOP. I'm a guy and back in high school there was a girl who always put me down and body-shamed me. But slowly venting changed What options do I have? I feel like divorce is the only next step, but it scares me to think of separating myself from my son's life. If you love him & he loves you, you need to have a conversation and tell him how it makes you feel. I get the feeling she taking out her frustration on me as she's feeling annoyed. She said that she never wants to see me again and blocked me on everything. My postgraduate qualifications are in counselling, so I guess I'm prepared for it. That's how we Hey reddit. depressed friend constantly puts me down . 5 years) constantly puts me down for Advertisement Coins. In the I don’t think her wanting your undivided attention is unreasonable, nor do I think your hobby time is unreasonable. I basically got together with her because she’s really sweet and kind. Since then I think it has improved in many aspects but I still feel like communication is the biggest issue. I haven't figured out yet if you feel badly about yourself - so your trying to drag me down with you - or if you just get off putting me down. Emotional abuse is insidious and can be hard to spot, especially when the abuser is trying to pass off their actions as romantic. This is starting to piss me off a bit. You deserve so much more. Hijackals need—and feed on—control, power, and status. But she kept saying I [31M] have been dating this girl [27F] for about 6 months now (been seeing her for a year in total). This is when I go to my room, or quit engaging in conversations. They sound like red flags. I feel like if the roles were swapped here, I’d be a labeled as a misogynistic man, which I totally understand why. And so I was put down constantly. Premium Powerups Explore Gaming. Need help with your relationship? Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or When I came back she was looking on my phone and got mad at me asking who she was. I don't want to give up My girlfriend and I have been going out for the past 2 months. And typically the person putting you down feels terrible about themselves, yes. I once returned from a meditation retreat and when I entered the door my parent began criticising me as per usual. Original - 22nd February 2024. How can I let her know how I’m feeling without being an asshole? Would it be My (30 year old) boyfriend tends to put me down whenever he's upset. Didn't load the dishwasher right. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now my best friend constantly puts me down and i don’t know what to do . She's broken you down and is using you like a mat to wipe her shoes on. Phenomenal attraction, honeymoon phase energy, never getting enough of each We moved in together and things were good. I couldn't date someone who would put me down about my food choices and threatening to break up just because I decided to have a treat, or even just because they don't agree with how I live day-to-day. Break up with him. i find myself constantly toning down my opinions and it’s very very difficult because i want to be liked by people, i don’t care about everyone but you don’t want to be difficult to be around. Relationships We've been dating for about 2 years, give or take. I also like to dress in 40s/50s vintage clothes, and whenever I am in "full outfit" (red lips, hat, curled hair) she always has to put me down. Phenomenal attraction, honeymoon phase energy, never getting enough of each The fact that she is breaking your confidence down bit by bit is one of the biggest warning signs there is of an abusive relationship. For the first 6 months, things were GREAT. We on average have a blow out at each other about once every 3 weeks, she’s always starting I've tried to hint, both subtly, and not so subtly, that while I'm not some prude etiquette nerd, her farting and burping disgusts me and I'd like her to tone it down. He constantly put this pressure that I was his “sunshine” and how he could never be happy without me, and if I ever left he would have to end things. A conversation that was constantly avoided and put off. I try and try constantly He replies: “Because we both know you have way more problems than me!” and he starts dancing and laughing. Tl;dr my(32m) girlfriend(32f) of 3 (10 complicated) years (living together for 2. She My friend constantly puts me down in group situations . We've been together a year now and live together. But something is telling me to be patient and work through this together. i didn’t give a reason as to why i don’t want to go, but it’s because my dad is even worse when he’s drinking. When they got to me, I said I was down to try “pushing the limit a little”, but only so long as in the instructor was in the room watching us and helping (trying to find middle ground between her opinion and mine). Right now, I'm really confused and I'm not sure on I wish it could be different because we both love each other deeply, but the constant assassination of my character has left me distant, angry, and resentful of his presence. i have a friend who we’ll call melanie. Now at home I said to her its not okay to yell at me (we had this discussion before). And then conflict. If that hurts Hypergamy my friend. Members Online • throwawayra_193771 . Out of shape, depressed Anytime I try to grow as a person or advance my career, education, whatever, my wife always discourages me and puts me down. Though I personally try to keep my screen only for my eyes around My (36F) girlfriend (28F) makes plans with me and then falls asleep or forgets or agrees to go into work or just gets too distracted and moves on. My (27M) wife (27F) does not like me showing off my body at all and gets incredibly insecure over it. I'm 29, she's 26. I spent most of high school with bad company and struggled a lot with my mental health, which my parents both know. from who like, to what’s happening in my life, to how i’m doing mentally. I have my own condo, she lives at home, although at this point she's practically moved in with me. The reason I didn't push harder for that talk? She told me I needed to stop being aggressive because that would make her shut down. I live Obviously, a sign of an emotionally draining relationship is when you are left tired, frustrated, and annoyed after spending time with your partner. She is constantly asking me how and why. We’ve been dating for five months and had no issues until a couple of weeks ago. After a few hours of being online and not talking to me she tells me that she knows and doesn't want to talk to me because she may say things she doesn't want to. Female friends put me down constantly . I have said these exact words. This realization came when he told me only a guilty Yes we are both girls. I had a pretty tough childhood and therefore was put into a lot of difficult situations all my life. I don't view it as fun banter, rather it's hurtful, and I would like to know how to address it It's not a gendered issue. At some point she just started treating me like this piece of shit who never does anything. Nothing could have just ONE reason. Put the measuring it just doesn’t make any sense to me every interaction we have is SO negative because he just puts me down, makes fun of me or guilt trips me. Also, things I have done to make her happy haven't worked, because she's not focused on positives, only imperfections. The witty put-down does have a place, but only among friends, and only to add to the merriment. This makes me feel scrutinized in the act and turns me off, which in turn makes her feel like im not attracted to her at all. Nothing was happening it was just when us and a group of friends used to hang out in high school. I’ve seen her for around 4 months now. I know I can also get riled up pretty quick, and my anger just blurs my thinking that it just leads to anxiety and This is how I found my ex-wife was cheating. Simply put, there is no magic formula that will change who she is and how she treats you. Expand user menu Open settings menu. Here are some examples: I feel you yell over very small things, like when I put the friend listens to gossip about me and jokingly puts me down around new people . So, it goes either way. Now I don't mind this and I Have you asked her to stop? My girlfriend used to do this and I realized I'd rather she kept it to herself. She’s gone as far as find a boyfriend with the same name as mine. He said, "sorry, I'll put it away," and we haven't discussed it since. She consistently puts me down, criticizing my achievements and goals. tl;dr: Girlfriend talks to me in ultimatums. I offered her space and told her to talk to me 296 votes, 55 comments. Preface: I'm Asian, so I don't really move out unless I have an explicit need to. I was puzzled when this happened to me a few times. She constantly puts me down all the time to for no reason. 5 years now. yoqic wyqgh qpsz bjktyz axwvc juzzpd uoi eagq oalqurn qlpsmy